Keith (
tempredmental) wrote in
deercountry2022-07-15 11:37 pm
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Entry tags:
[ open - July Catch-All ]
Who: Keith, OPEN
What: Being evil, falling in love, worsening corruption, contemplating suicide, getting killed, waking up, facing judgement, feeling lonely... just another day in Trench
When: All through July, specific dates for prompts will be in headers
Where: Various places around Trench
Content Warnings: Death and suicide are the big ones. Feelings of abandonment and self-loathing. Probably all kinds of violence and stuff. Others will be added per thread.
What: Being evil, falling in love, worsening corruption, contemplating suicide, getting killed, waking up, facing judgement, feeling lonely... just another day in Trench
When: All through July, specific dates for prompts will be in headers
Where: Various places around Trench
Content Warnings: Death and suicide are the big ones. Feelings of abandonment and self-loathing. Probably all kinds of violence and stuff. Others will be added per thread.
- Links to threads will be added as they're made
- July 1 - 9: General havoc around town. Violence, crime, anger, growing beasthood, influenced by The Evil
- July 10: Death, closed to Lance, Sasuke, possibly Sakura, any other CR who might be involved with finding bodies and helping squids break out of crystal
- July 11 - 17: Recovery, TBD (likely closed to close CR, Plot with me?, recovery and squid-time will be in Sasuke's pond...)
- Rest of the month: TBD (Plot with me?)
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[Honestly, not thinking hard about it sounded like an amazing idea, but his brain wouldn't let him let it go.
He remember Lance coming for him on the beach... trying to save him... then pain. He cringed again, taking in a sharp breath before finally forcing himself to move. Maybe, if he didn't just lay there on the stone, he wouldn't think as much. He groaned a bit, and gingerly pushed himself up into a sitting position.]
Are those... clothes...?
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Oh, right. Yeah… those're yours.
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[Moving still felt weird. Like... what are bones? And he was still wet. Some water dripped off his hair and down his back, making his shiver a bit.]
Towel?
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It's within his reach, so he grabs it and unfolds it enough to drape over Keith's shoulder, to yanno, get him started.]
I turned back like a couple hours ago… it gets easier. [Quicker than when waking up for the first time on the beach.]
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Couple hours, huh? [Making words in his head was getting easier, too.] Were you... here, too? [Keith vaguely remembered another squid... blue... also a jumper. He felt like he'd been out on the stones of this garden a few times, but he couldn't consciously remember it.]
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Um, yeah. I was.
[He really doesn't know what else to say about it.]
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Sorry...
[Because this was totally his fault.]
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It's not your fault.
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Isn't it? [He got the Reckoning's attention in the first place. If he hadn't done that, then Lance wouldn't have felt compelled to intervene. It was that simple.]
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I, um… did it to myself. [Then he shakes his head before Keith can ask.] I dunno how to explain it right now, but… even if Reckoning finished me off, it wouldn't've been your fault. You didn't deserve any of that.
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[And, honestly, Keith didn't really blame her. He'd gotten possessed and had his temper messed with how many times already in this place, and hadn't even been there a year, yet. He was weak, and kept letting it happen.]
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Pthumerians aren't exactly super great at nuance and they're total hypocrites. Reckoning looks at everything in black and white and just goes around killing people without a trial or even asking super important questions like 'why'. Nope, doesn't matter to her that your brain was being warped by the weird effects of her month. So who's gonna exact justice on her, huh? Isn't she just as responsible for bad things that happened in the month where she's supposed to have more power?
[He's frustrated and also painfully aware he's also a hypocrite for arguing this when he still blames himself for things everyone's told him was not his fault for a long time now. He lets out another breath and shakes his head.]
It's way more complicated than she wants you to think, man.
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[Seriously. Even if Lance hadn't been in the same spot, he had to know by now that Keith was really good at blaming himself. Sure, when he knew he wasn't wrong, he fought fiercely to make sure people knew he was right, because he had spent a good portion of his childhood getting blamed for stuff that wasn't something in his control. But, when he was wrong? Or not entirely sure? He tended to shoulder that onto himself pretty heavily.
Keith pulled the towel around himself, kind of curling up into it for a bit before gingerly starting to rub his arms dry.]
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He settles for heaving a breath and grabs another towel that was folded up with the other and places it on Keith's head. He then proceeds to unceremoniously just start helping him dry his hair. And this doesn't feel uncomfortable to him because he still doesn't really remember the nature of their past relationship. It's more like helpful locker room bro stuff to him, but there is some weird feeling in his chest he ignores since he doesn't know what it is or means.]
…I didn't say it should be easy to let it go. I said it's not that simple. And it's not your fault, even if you don't feel that way… and I'll keep saying it for as long as it takes for you to get it through your thick mullet.
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It's not a mullet...
[Yup. That was the important part here.]
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Sure looks like one to- oh I dunno- anyone with eyes.
[If Keith wants to pivot to a subject easier to process, that's fine with him.]
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Then they're all dumb.
[His tone wasn't really as into it as he normally would be, but he was responding, at least. So that was something, right? But he did have to get dressed. Running around nude in Trench, even in someone's house, wasn't a great idea. So, once he was sure of his legs, he eased himself off the ground and moved to grab the clothes that had been next to Lance.]
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A tightness forms in his throat when he gets too close and he mentally jerks back like he almost touched a hot stove. Then shakes his head and coughs into a fist. He can hear that Keith right now is not pouting and huffing, he literally just turned back to human after dying after hurting people and that's a lot, that's what he's gotta stay focused on.]
Uh, think again. When it comes to hair, I'm a certified genius.
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Okay, Mr Hair Genius. Whatever you say.
[He tried really hard to make that sound light and teasing. He didn't quite get there.
At least he was trying.]
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Despite how foggy his memory is since deerhood it's been gradually improving and there's no way he could fully forget when they were on the beach and he took his pain out on Mariana. How broken he was then and how helpless he knew Keith felt despite desperately wanting to help. And Lance knows there is very little he can do having been on both sides of this sort of situation. It makes him sick with roiling frustrated despair. But he swallows it down.]
I do say. Aaand tell you what, I'll give you one time only chance to get a nugget of hair wisdom from the master himself.
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So, he pushed the feeling and thoughts about it away.
He glanced towards Lance, not quite meeting his eyes, but looking through his hair, like it was a protective mask...]
I'm not cutting it.
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He huffs a breath of a forced laugh and half-heartedly rolls his eyes.]
I wasn't gonna say that. [And he really wasn't. For some reason he… doesn't want him to cut it deep down.]
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I was gonna say… that if anyone can pull off a mullet, it's you.
[A roundabout way of trying to get across that mullet doesn't necessarily have to be a negative term… /cough. He will never directly admit it, though. At least not any time soon.]
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Being a squid really rattled your brain, huh?
[Because, really... since when was Lance actually admitting it was okay for him to have his hair long like this? Like... never?]
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cw: blood, sword wounds, hallucinations, flashbacks
cw: blood, sword wounds, hallucinations, flashbacks
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